In the company of

Your absence
were that many philosophies
that many theories;
lessons of a lifetime
friendships that had to pass a certain test
(all put together)

your absence
needed that many words to mend
that much time
that much thought

and I want to forget you
be what I was before
because I never learnt
why you came
and if you came
what you brought

and now that you have gone
I do not understand if I am
less by love or
more by experience

Should I wear the ‘less by love’
as a handicap
or the ‘more by experience’
as an ornament

But one thing is for sure
that you remind me
of how I had left
a boy with dreams in his eyes
years earlier
across a college road
never to come back

He told me later
he took six months
to recover

my absence equaled
in many moments of memory
in many words from friends

probably that’s the same thing now
you have come to make me bleed
and show me the opportunity cost
of a love lost

- R